Are You Being Abused and Don't Know it? The Gray Areas of ...

When I was in college I spent over a year in an abusive relationship. ?Why would I stay if it was abusive? ?Honestly, I didn?t realize that it was. ?So many times when people talk about couple?s abuse it?s very black and white. ?The criteria that most people know to indicate these types of relationships is if your mate is putting his/her hands on you, or verbally abusing you. ?In my relationship my boyfriend never laid a finger on me, and he never called me out of my name. ?However, when I had to go to therapy to help me rebuild the self-damage that he inflicted on me, I realized then that the relationship was very abusive. ?So to you, dear readers, even though I don?t know you, know that I love you enough to not want you to go through what I did. ?It took many years for me to even be able to look myself in the mirror and like what I saw, not have a panic attack whenever I walked past a reflective surface, or get angry at a guy because he liked me (?How can he like me? ?Is it a trick? ?Doesn?t he see me? ?Is this some type of joke??).

To give a little bit of background, I?ve always been a very commitment phobic person. ?I don?t have a problem with making friends, but I?ve always been very cautious of romantic relationships. ?Before I met my husband I had been in three previous relationships. My third relationship was the abusive one, and it took me three years to get over that before I actually started dating again. ?So when that third relationship started to get abusive, since I was so inexperienced with relationships, I didn?t know that it was wrong. ?I didn?t have any knowledge to go on and my boyfriend was so secretive, he didn?t want me to talk about the relationship to anyone. ?So when I wanted to ask my family and friends if this relationship was normal, because I was loyal to him, I didn?t ask and I continued to be in the dark to what a crazy situation I was in. ?When I would ask my boyfriend if this stuff was the familiar he would always say: ??Of course it is. ?You haven?t been in a lot of relationships so you don?t know.?

However, there are signs that things are out of whack in your union, and even if your beau is telling you it?s normal. ?Please know that it?s not.

He cuts off communication you have with others.? At the time we were dating I didn?t have a cell phone, only a landline in my dorm. ?Whenever he was in the room with me he wouldn?t let me answer my phone. ?The way I didn?t see it as abusive was that whenever the phone rang he would pull me into him lovingly and say things like: ??No, be here with me right now.? ?Then, he would also want to take all of my time. ?Having someone being possessive of you might sound very endearing, but when that person systematically becomes what your life revolves around (with a very small margin of wiggle room for friends, and family), then it?s not a healthy union.

He/She wants to hide the relationship.? Now, there?s nothing wrong with trying to keep the intimate parts of your relationship (either physically intimate or emotionally intimate) between the two of you, but when the person doesn?t want to claim you, then that?s a problem. ?My boyfriend?s excuse was that he had gotten out of a very?tumultuous?relationship that lead rumors to be spread about him. ?He wanted to stay under the radar when it came to relationships. ?Well, that was fine to me when it came to being on campus, but when he didn?t even want to tell his family about me, and they were steady trying to set him up on dates and he would accept? yeah? something?s not right. ?Which leads me to my next thing?

He doesn?t respect you.? During the time that his family was setting him up on dates, they would ask him to take a picture of himself, and send it to them in a text message so they could show his potential suitors. ?Why did he ask me to take the pictures for him? ?On top of that, WHY DID I TAKE THE PICTURES?!?! ?But, to use another less pathetic example, he asked to borrow some money from me. ?When he came to pay me back, instead of handing me my money in my outstretched hand, he actually THREW IT AT ME, and sang Fat Joe?s ?Make it Rain? while smiling in my face.

Now, no disrespect to any woman who has spent time on a pole, but I?ve never been one, and I certainly wasn?t on one when he threw my money at me. ?Someone who doesn?t respect you is someone who doesn?t deserve to be with you.

You?re not allowed to be yourself.? Before we started dating, we were actually friends for like a year. ?I had gained the sophomore 30 (I was always an overachiever) and he was helping me to lose weight. ?After I lost 40 pounds, he began to put his input on other things that I should change about myself. ?Like, throwing away outfits of mine that he hated. ?Or not liking how wide my smile was and making me practice my smile in the mirror for twenty minutes a day? as he watched?. Or making me take pictures down on my Facebook of my friends and I making silly faces. ?He told me how?disproportionate?I was for having a small middle and a large bottom, and he would force me to do hundreds of squats? while he watched. ?When we would get take out, only ?he could eat, and those burgers that I loved so much would become his and I couldn?t even eat the fries.

The things that I began to love about myself all seemed wrong. ?I began to hate my smile, my body, and myself for being ?not right.? ?One day he wanted me to look in the mirror and I started crying because I didn?t want to see myself, he apologized for being so harsh, but the damage had been done.

To this day, I still wonder if he was cognitive of what he was doing. ?He swears that he didn?t know, and he was only trying to help me, but it doesn?t change the fact that the relationship definitely fell in that gray area of abuse that no one talks about. ?It took three years to finally like myself again, and to trust a relationship. ?After having my daughter it?s still very hard sometimes to look at my transitioning body as I try to lose the baby weight I gained and not hear his voice chastising me, but once you move out of the gray, it?s nothing but blue skies from there.

Kendra Koger is finally loving herself for her. ?Love yourself too, and love yourself at her twitter, kkoger. ?Don?t really love yourself there, but? you know what I mean!!

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Reaping The Rewards Of Personal Development With Home ...

You can accomplish a great deal more in your business if you make the bold decision to engage in self improvement. Sadly, most online business owners and entrepreneurs fail to take full advantage of this particular field. Most of the people out there are more focused on making money and creating lots of success. This certainly makes sense and it merely appears to be a reflection on what the average person chooses to do. Most people, especially those who aren?t trying to earn money with their own business efforts, don?t seem to want to work on improving themselves. It takes sustained hard work and the willingness to be objective in order to resolve personal issues. Here are several important areas involving self improvement that can make a positive contribution to your business efforts.

Bad news and misery are top items when watching the news every evening. Producers do know what will or won?t sell. Is what you hear from those around you more positive or negative? Business is perhaps one of the few endeavors that demands a positive outlook and frame of mind. If you think the worst about all that you are doing, then you will not be able to succeed. Do a little soul searching and figure out where you are. With some effort and attention, it isn?t difficult to change your outlook. Your business will benefit greatly by doing this. It is important to realize that the more relationships that you build in a healthy manner will help improve your ability to succeed. This is a fact that is very much alive on the net today. The concept of strength in numbers is very real, and may have its roots in our genetics in regard to how we desire to be part of a group. By meeting someone in a social setting, it may be one of the most important aspects of your business building career which is why social networking is important. This is not to say that your affinity toward a nonsocial everyday life is bad; you need to consider that being social can actually help you achieve your dreams.

At one time or another as your proceed in your new IM business career, you will make bad decisions, mistakes, gaffs and blunders. Its very true when we tell you that you are not alone in this and won?t ever be.

Should those unfortunate times happen to you, don?t put yourself down for it. Truthfully, we?ve seen business people really beat themselves up at times. Just realize that is really counter-productive, and we do feel that is a carry-over from an earlier time. Maybe that person grew up with a parent who berated them. Allow yourself some compassion and understanding during these times.

Whatever your issues are you should face them straight away before they cause worse problems. Self improvement, if you put your mind to it, can be an effective and powerful tool.

It?s not hard to become overcome with all the stuff that could potentially go wrong with your business. One method to help is to use some financial risk management software. There are numerous forms of this that can be used for many various applications. Try some today and see how it can help.

For extremely scored risk management software comparison visit the risk management software comparison website today.

Related posts:

  1. Advanced Diploma of Business ? which has a emphasis in Advertising and marketing.
  2. Data Entry From Home Over The Internet Job Opportunities ? They Really Can Be Acquired?
  3. Controlling mind through meditation
  4. How to be sure that you pick a qualified insurance for your personal or company use
  5. Enjoy free background music and its rewards

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Forex Trading Fundamentals For Starters

by Tij Ced on April 19, 2012

Forex trading has emerged as a very profitable and lucrative with inherent risk trade market. However in this market the trading is usually done in currencies. Several companies have registered huge profits through forex trading. In simple words forex trade is defined as the buying and selling of the currencies from all over the world by the brokers operating online.

The brokers allow investors to leverage such that the investors can transact 100 or 200 times more than their capital. The forex transactions take place across the globe online 24 hours a day. The currencies are traded in pairs. For instance Euro-US dollar pair, Euro-Canadian dollar pairs etc.

The forex market usually deals in buying and selling of the leading currencies of the world. The most popular currencies that are dealt in forex are, Euro(EUR), US dollar (USD), Canadian dollar (CND), Swiss Franc (CHD),Australian Dollar (AUD),British Pound (GBP), Japanese Yen (JPY) and the New Zealand dollar (NZD).The investor sells or buys these currencies in pairs as per the relevant forex rates.

For example the forex rate for EUR/USD is 1.31 for 5th Feb, 2012 i.e., if the investor spends 1032 he will get 1000 EUR in return? Now if these rates move to 1.58 in like one year the investor can sell his 1000 EUR and get 1058 dollars in return, thus yielding him $26. Thus the base currency here would be EUR i.e. the currency a buyer is interested to buy, while the counter currency would be USD. Now these fluctuations on huge sum of money yield tremendous returns on investment.

Since the forex trading does not involve brokerage, the purchase or bid of a currency pair is normally higher than the sale or the ask price of the same currency pair. This difference is termed as spread. The differential in the bid/ask is defined in points known as Pip and one Pip is normally equivalent to 0.0001 difference in the bid/ask rate.

Learn more about lit coffre. Stop by Author Name?s site where you can find out all about range chaussures and what it can do for you.

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The best way to Build a Pathway of Sunflowers | Home Improvement ...

Garden

 The best way to Build a Pathway of SunflowersAsk anyone which annual flower best sums along the hot sunny times of summer and they are going to say the sunflower. Sunflowers take little time to rise from seed and supply a cheerful testament to summer sunshine to anyone visiting your residence. They?re also a great way to get children associated with growing and nurturing plants the same as so easy and fun to grow. This short creative garden project can show you how you can develop a walkway of sunflowers by planting them either side of your path in your own garden. To create an alley of sunflowers you will need twenty small plastic pots with netting, some compost, seeds for only a large variety of sunflower, a number of small stone slabs, bamboo canes and garden twine or string.

To sow your sunflower seeds, fill each pot with general purpose compost and firm down. Build a small hole throughout compost with a pencil, about 2cm deep, and add one single seed into the hole. Cover each seed with more compost before firming down and watering well. Place the pots on sunny window sill to germinate. While you?re expecting your seeds to germinate, select a patch of ground in its entirety sun around 3.5m x 1m. Put the stone slabs on the floor to construct a path of stepping stones that could wind in the center of your sunflower alley. For those who don?t want to build a path from scratch, you will certainly make use of an existing path having beds on either side.

Once your sunflowers have germinated and reached around 20cm in height, and there?s no longer any risk of frost, you might be willing to plant every one of them. Make two rows of ten sunflower plants a minimum of 1m apart. This would provide enough room simply to walk through the heart of them while they are fully grown. To plant each sunflower, dig a hole with a trowel at the very least twice the dimensions of the pot. Remove each plant carefully and place in debt, back filling with soil after which firming the soil down around it. Each sunflower needs to be planted about 30cm out of your one alongside it. Once all of the sunflowers have been planted, water them in well. In the event the sunflowers have reached around 1m tall, these can really need to be staked to avoid them blowing over in strong winds. Insert a bamboo cane along with each plant and secure the stem of many plants to the cane using garden twine or string, guaranteeing not to tie it too tightly. You may need to loosen off the ties since the plants obtain greater and also the stems thicken.

Although sunflowers need a lot of sunshine, they are also thirsty plants, so that you might want to ensure that they are regularly watered. Quickly you?ll be amazed at how these plants that started off life in small garden planters can grow so tall and imposing! Once your sunflowers have died back, leave them in situ for winter when their seeds can provide valuable food for garden birds. Jo Poultney is maybe two people behind Garden Planters. We have an RHS general certificate in horticulture. Garden Planters source unusual outdoor and indoor planters, along with garden related gifts ? whatever your taste, whether it s traditional, modern or merely a bit quirky, we will have something to you. I recommend garden planters are a major component of any garden ? they enhance the overall design and say a bit about someone to whom the backyard belongs.

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Barobo's Mobot goes up for pre-order, slinks toward your impressionable children (video)

ImageIn what may be the first notable instance of a product actually losing the "i" in favor of building out its own persona, Barobo's iMobot is not only not going by Mobot, but it's also up for pre-order. The modular robotics platform can be claimed for $269.95 (with extension plates and the like available as optional extras), and we're told by the company that these will be on the move by August at the latest. Moreover, a grant has been secured to provide "at least $500,000 over the next two years to Barobo, with potential for up to another $500,000 in matching funds if the company can make sales and attract venture capital." Folks involved with the project are hoping to see Mobot used as a tool for teaching robotics as early as third grade, and given the choice of tinkering with one of these or fiddling with a TI-83 Plus... well, you know. For those unaware of Mobot's potential, head on past the break for a freshly cut video.

Continue reading Barobo's Mobot goes up for pre-order, slinks toward your impressionable children (video)

Barobo's Mobot goes up for pre-order, slinks toward your impressionable children (video) originally appeared on Engadget on Thu, 19 Apr 2012 08:30:00 EDT. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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How We Identify Single Voices in a Crowd [Science]

There are plenty of human abilities that we take for granted, but which are actually insanely complex. Like picking out a single voice buried amongst the noise of a crowded environment, a problem which has troubled scientists for decades. But now they've worked out how we do it—and it could revolutionize speech recognition technology. More »


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StopTheHacker Web-Malware Scanning

You've installed antivirus protection for your company's PCs and set it to scan regularly, right? StopTheHacker Web-Malware Scanning (from $10/month) extends similar protection to your company's website. Depending on the level of service you choose, it will check whether your site has been blacklisted, detect known Web-based malware, detect as-yet-unknown Web threats, protect your corporate Facebook page, and even fix found threats automatically.

This is important stuff. A hack attack on your company website can be devastating. Customers won't thank you for infesting their PCs with drive-by downloads. Google and others may blacklist your site, marking it as dangerous in search results; getting off the blacklist can take time. Peter Jensen, CEO of StopTheHacker, states that at any given time 2.5 to 5 percent of all websites are infested with malware, and 75 percent are vulnerable to malware attack.

Levels of Service
StopTheHacker offers a free service that does nothing but keep track of blacklists and warn you any time your site gets blacklisted. Of course, once you've been blacklisted you're already in trouble, but knowing it happened is better than sailing along in blissful ignorance.

At the basic $10 per month protection level, StopTheHacker regularly checks all pages on your site for known viruses and Web-based malware. If the scan finds that a threat has been injected into your website's code it reports on the source of the problem, right down to the offending lines of code. You also get a "StopTheHacker Trust Seal" to display on your site.

The $20 per month Professional subscription adds advanced detection of threats that aren't already known, using artificial intelligence techniques. At this level you can request automatic cleaning of any found malware?very handy if your small business doesn't have an in-house Web designer. You'll also get protection for the corporate Facebook wall.

The one additional service you'll get by going for the $50 per month Business level is a scan for vulnerabilities. Besides scanning for known and unknown threats, StopTheHacker will analyze your website for apps and components that are out of date and therefore insecure. Finally, at the $100/month Enterprise level, experts from StopTheHacker will perform annual security audit on your site, spending a day consulting with your webmasters.

The $20 per month subscription appears to offer the most bang for the buck, and indeed, StopTheHacker identifies it as "most popular."

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Calling All Startups: TechCrunch New York Just Posted Office Hours

OfficeHoursClipArt_0The other day, I had the idea to open up Office Hours here in New York. And when I say "I had the idea," I mean that I stole it from Mike Butcher who had the brilliant plan to do the same thing in Europe. There's no reason to get all long-winded, so I'll just hit you with the specs.

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